Put the Lime in the Coconut

Here is the newest member of my deck garden: a Thornless Mexican Lime tree--also called Key Lime.

I am very excited about this tree. I like cooking with limes, and I like limes in my iced tea. I prefer limes over lemons any day of the week.

Decisions and Progress

I have just about completed the first week of my summer graduate class at UTSA: 17th Century Drama. I am thoroughly enjoying this class so far. I sincerely hope this enthusiasm persists for the next 4 weeks . . . I think it will. Even though I am grappling with several issues, worries, and decisions in my life right now (not necessarily related to school), I am happy.

I made an A in both classes this past spring. I do not feel I deserve the As, but there they are. I have been working on my attitude, and I am making progress. Digging my way out from the tunnel of my indifference has been hard, but I can see blue skies between the clouds, and I have struggled harder for other things in the past. I can do this . . . I am doing this.

June 11, 1994

Almost fifteen years ago, I received a small rubber tree plant from my brother-in-law and his wife--Jon and Barb. This unexpected gift arrived at our door with a note attached and addressed to me: "Welcome to the family!"

June 11, 1994. This was a very good day.

I still have that rubber tree plant fifteen years later. It is not so small anymore. I take special care each winter to ensure it does not freeze, and I water it regularly. I try to treat it with the love and respect I think it needs and deserves. This rubber tree is more than just a plant that gets bigger each year. This plant represents my marriage. It has grown in beauty even though it has seen its fair share of weather and just plain ol' everyday age. It thrives.

Like this rubber tree plant, my marriage to Ken is bursting with God's abundant gift of Life and Love as well as the constant reaching out to offer a reassuring touch full of sweet tenderness and devotion. I would not have it any other way. I am welcome in this family, and so is this rubber tree plant Y

Moonlight Walk Beautification Project: Garden Bench

I finally decided to drag the garden bench (with Ken's help) from the backyard to the front porch. This poor bench has never really served its intended purpose as a nice place to sit or a charming object strategically placed to beautify an area, and it has been subjected to all kinds of weather for several years.

These two before pictures were taken after I had already started sanding the wood. I needed to turn the bench on its end so that I could sand and stain the underside. These pictures show how the wood was very weathered from constant sun and rain throughout the years. The top of the bench was more weathered than the bottom, but all of the original stain was long gone--leaving our neglected bench to sit patiently in all its naked glory.

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Here is the after picture. I chose a red mahogany stain rather than the oak stain that we have throughout the inside of the house. I think the rich color looks attractive next to the green metal as well as next to the brick and tile.

Ken was more excited than I expected when I finished this project. I am not really sure why he reacted so enthusiastically, but his praise definitely made me happy and ready to tackle the next Moonlight Walk Beautification Project: staining the deck!

Making the Grade

I have officially completed my first semester of grad school (master's degree). I have not received my final grades yet, but I am not stressing about that. I have decided that I will be fine if I make a B in one or both classes. I know I made all As as an undergraduate, but that was way too stressful. Making a B is OK! Actually, I think I deserve a B in both of my classes this semester. I struggled a lot to find enthusiasm when it came to writing my papers. I was not happy with any of them really. I definitely did not give them my best.

What bothers me the most is that I have no feelings either way about completing my first semester. I am happy that I can read and do whatever I want without a paper looming. Other than that . . . indifference. That is out of character for me, and I do not like it. I have decided to get more involved at school--like attend some lectures, etc. I think that is what I am missing. I have been so used to being on campus most of the day, every day. This semester I was hardly there except to attend class twice a week. I need to soak up a little more academic atmosphere.

I like this plan. I shall call it Plan B.

Let Them Eat Cake

Would anyone care for some fruit . . . or dessert?

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I had a fairly nice birthday yesterday--not too much attention, just the way I like it. I absolutely hate surprise parties of any kind. I have been victimized in this way before, and I still cringe with horror when I think about it . . . seriously. I did have a birthday cake this year for the first time in a very long time. The cake was a surprise, but that was definitely okay with me.

So this birthday was low-key, and it went by sort of quietly: breakfast with my husband, Mass at 5pm, and dinner/cake with good friends. Very nice indeed.

Now . . . time to start enjoying my next year!

Say What You Really Mean

I have been bothered by something for awhile now, but I have not exactly known how to express it or even if I have really known how I was feeling and why.

I will start by saying that I like going to school and just about everything that goes along with it such as reading, analyzing and discussing literature, writing, et cetera. I also like the fact that Ken has made a name for himself in the world of pool. I can see that he is happy and fulfilled with his talent at the billiard table. His happiness makes me happy.

But . . .

While I enjoy having time to myself to read, study, write papers, etc., and I enjoy knowing that Ken is having a lot of fun playing pool, there is something that I do not enjoy.

I do not enjoy all the time we spend apart. I would never begrudge Ken's pool playing time, and I know he wants to give me space to study, but I miss him...a lot.

Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday I only see him for a few minutes in the morning because I am usually asleep when he comes home from playing in his league. This semester I have a class on Wednesday night, so I see him only for a little bit when I get home. The only time we have dinner together is on the weekend--and not every Saturday night if he is playing in a pool tournament. AND if the Spurs are playing on TV, well . . .

This pattern has been going on for quite some time now, and I find myself looking forward to those evenings alone. I do not mean to say I do not want Ken to be home. I definitely LOVE for him to be home, and I love spending time together on the weekends. But I have also enjoyed the evenings when I can listen to music or read in total silence. There needs to be a happy medium, but I think we have drifted away from that. I do not like the idea that we have both settled (a little too comfortably I might add) into this pattern. But . . . patterns can change.

I am looking forward to going to Las Vegas next week. Even though Ken will be playing pool part of the time, and the lure of the slots will be difficult for him to ignore completely, I know we will still have quite a bit of time together. This is important, and I am going to take full advantage of this time with my husband!

Navigating Rough Terrain

Hear the Bird's Song

Self-pity
by DH Lawrence

I never saw a wild thing
sorry for itself.
A small bird will drop frozen dead from a bough
without ever having felt sorry for itself.
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But now ask the beasts to teach you, and the birds of the air to tell you; Or the reptiles on earth to instruct you, and the fish of the sea to inform you. Which of all these does not know that the hand of God has done this? In his hand is the soul of every living thing, and the life breath of all mankind. Does not the ear judge words as the mouth tastes food? So with old age is wisdom, and with length of days understanding. ~ Job 12:7-12

The Moonlight Walk Natural and Effective Security System

The cute little needles on this cactus are a natural deterrent for all those robbers, solicitors, and maniacs who might venture into the neighborhood. You can see our cactus is spreading its wings and growing new pads with deceptively soft points. It is only a matter of time before the new pads bare their sharp claws. I happen to know firsthand how hurtful these vicious plants can be.

Many, many, MANY years ago, on a hot summer day, we put on our bathing suits and ran out to the backyard to play in the sprinklers. Mom had one of these wicked child-hater succulents in the backyard on a shelf (why she would have this around small children is beyond me . . . hmmm). Anyway, while I was whirling and flapping around the yard, I backed into that plant's prickly clutches - or maybe that evil cactus monster of 199 Peach Valley unfurled its wings, kicked off from its perch, and zeroed in on my tender flesh. All I knew for sure was that I suddenly had about a dozen of those razor sharp death needles in my back. My sister, Regina, donned her superhero cape and sprang into action! She swiftly plucked those points out of my screaming back and simultaneously blasted my skin with water from the garden hose to detract the pain . . . genius. Thank goodness for big sisters.

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Beware the beastly menace lurking in our front yard! It knows if you are a welcome visitor or . . .